Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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