We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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