I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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