...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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