I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize