If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
