were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize