Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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