Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
