It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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