The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
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