So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
