He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
