Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I wish you could order shots online.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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