Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
You were trust falling into bushes
Randomize
