Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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