so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
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the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
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It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
We left the knife in your bed.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize