Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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