I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
