the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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