The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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