I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
