thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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