honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
