Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize
