Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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