PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize