yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
