Pants 0. Shit 1.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Rumble strips road head = magical
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
