One girl and one boy is just not enough.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
