I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
