He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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