can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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