i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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