Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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