I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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