jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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