Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
