My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
