Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
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