i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
