Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
