I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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