bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
