So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
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