Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
