literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
