No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
