So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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