talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I look better un-naked...
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
